When it comes to the 2023 NFL season, there’s not a whole lot to be thankful for if you’re a Patriots fan. The team is 2-8, there are glaring holes at virtually every position, and the future of the franchise is very much in doubt. Having a Top 5 overall pick in next year’s draft will be nice, but still… usually around this time, the conversations at Thanksgiving tables all across Patriots Nation center around who the team will most likely face in the Divisional Round, not which of their many areas of need they’ll be filling with their first pick. Alas, all good things must come to an end.
But hey, speaking of ends…
Thank you – oh thank you thank you thank you, Buttfumble. May your bootylicious light shine on forever.
No matter how bad things may get around these parts, the fourth Thursday in November will always be a cause for celebration in New England. Not only do we all get to take a moment to press pause, enjoy an amazing meal with family and friends, and simply express our thanks for the many blessings in our lives, but we also have a chance to once again celebrate what may very well be the single greatest regular season moment in Patriots history.
For on this very night, 11 years ago, gluttonous Americans nationwide unbuckled their belts, heaved up out of their dining room chairs, waddled over to their sofas, and plopped their now-15-pounds-heavier selves down in front of a Thanksgiving Night matchup between the New England Patriots and the New York Jets to watch was was expected to be a quality contest. The Jets were in the middle of a mini-run, and the Patriots were the Patriots, so there was no reason to think that this would be a laugher.
We all expected to see a football game – but none of us could have possibly prepared ourselves for what was about to take place.
Courtesy of Mark Sanchez, Brandon Moore, Vince Wilfork, and Steve Gregory, the single worst play in NFL history was born.
We’ve all seen the play countless times by now, and I’ve recapped it here ten times already, so I’m not sure how much more justice I could do The Buttfumble at this point. If I were to leave the description of the play up to the fine folks at ESPN, it would look like this:
1st & 10 at NYJ 31 (9:10 – 2nd) M.Sanchez up the middle to NYJ 32 for 1 yard. FUMBLES, RECOVERED by NE-S.Gregory at NYJ 32. S.Gregory for 32 yards, TOUCHDOWN.
But it was so, so much more than that. A busted play quickly became a butted play as Sanchez, trying to salvage something, scrambled up the gut just as Vince Wilfork got a strong push on Moore. Sanchez’s face collided with Moore’s booty, the ball came loose, and Gregory strolled effortlessly into the end zone. The Patriots scored 35 second quarter points, 21 of them in the span of 52 seconds, and the Patriots would go on to win in a 49-19 drubbing that we will forever associate with the best holiday on the calendar.
What a play. What a Thanksgiving. What an amazing gift that keeps on giving, year in and year out. As long as we all live, no matter how bad things get for this team, Patriots fans will always have something to celebrate every November.
I know this season hasn’t worked out for the Patriots. But I’ll forever be thankful to be a Patriots fan, if for no other reason than seasons like 2023 are the exception, not the rule, and despite our best efforts as of late, we still haven’t even come close to having a play this absurd on our lowlights reel. That we’ll always be able to look back at the Buttfumble, no matter what, is something I’ll always appreciate.
A very happy Thanksgiving to you all. Hope you find some time over the next few days to stuff your faces and avoid politics and capitalize on some Black Friday deals. And should the various traditions at your respective houses include an annual family flag football game to work up an appetite before dinner, be sure to keep your face masks well clear of any and all posteriors. Nothing good comes out of that.
