When Sexyy Red took the stage at the “BET Hip-Hop Awards” 2023 in early October, it wasn’t just a thrilling performance. It was a subtle statement. Slinging her trademark firetruck red mane, she swung her trigger fingers and ran through her growing bevy of crowd pleasers, including her latest anthem, “Shake Yo Dreads.” Witnessing her in all of her Crime Mob-adjacent glory was a joy, not just because she’s a budding superstar with real stage presence and breath control, but also because she was recently the victim of a sex tape leak. The performance was her first since the video was disseminated on the internet. I imagine pulling out of her set could have been easier than facing a crowd.
The audience, which thankfully revealed itself to be stacked with supporters, could’ve been a bloodthirsty lot—like many X, Facebook, and Instagram users who were quick to bash the rapper. “[S]exyy [R]ed disgusting asf wtfff,” wrote one X user in response to the leaked video. “We Finally Understand How You Got The Drake Feature,” another person wrote under a Facebook post. Sexyy Red briefly spoke about the incident and denied that she was the person who posted the explicit video to her Instagram story, saying, “I’m so heartbroken anybody that kno me knows I wouldn’t do no goofy sh*t like that.” It wasn’t an apology because truthfully, it didn’t need to be, but it had a different tone than her usual nonplussed attitude that’s come to define her personality and work.
People feel comfortable speaking carelessly about a nonconsensual post of Sexyy Red’s private encounter—and about her overall. She’s routinely referred to as unclean, and it seems almost Herculean to view her as the victim in the situation. The freedom employed when she’s discussing her own life in her music emboldens people to harass her online.
The purpose of some sex tape leaks, as was the case with Baywatch actress Pamela Anderson in 1995, is to embarrass. Due to the misogyny America happily stews itself in, and the way it seeps into the lives of women in rap, women bear both the brunt of the supposed embarrassment and the blame for transgressions that aren’t theirs.
Today’s women in rap find themselves in a stifling climate that’s an indicator of a larger global issue. The rise of incel culture, the push to undo the work of the #MeToo movement and feminism, and powerful political figures who dehumanize women combine to make hating women appear casual. Fun even. Once the concept of toxic masculinity became a fourth-wall-breaking marketing tactic utilized by an international pop star, its heels were deep in the dirt. It’s unfair to say that men don’t pay a price for it, because generations of boys younger and younger are learning to project all of their fears and self-hatred onto girls, which is its own ouroboros. Just don’t expect tiny violin concertos anytime soon.
For years, activists, journalists, and everyday critical thinkers have spoken at length about the mistreatment of women in rap. So much so that there’s content that can be recirculated (without augmentation) that maintains relevance. There is a certain venom sprayed by popular male hip-hop artists and music “fans” stemming from an increasingly volatile culture of patriarchal domination. From disgusting suggestions that the only thing “Munch” artist Ice Spice would be good for is porn, to calling Lil’ Kim a “baboon” whose success seemingly led to rap dissolving into a nonmusical sex bash, it doesn’t appear that misogyny’s wheels are losing speed.
Lil’ Kim isn’t just a monumental figure in hip-hop but a pop culture mainstay who innovated across luxury fashion and personal branding. If you let the web tell the story, though, she’s a woman reduced to what she once looked like. In 2021, 50 Cent blasted her when he reposted a meme comparing her to a bird, and it’s not unordinary to see comments about her looks on Instagram. The sad parallel that gets lost is the very practices that led to Kim’s admitted plastic surgery–colorism, physical abuse, and American beauty standards—are the ones used to tear her down today.
The intense scrutiny isn’t just reserved for women whose lyrics are sexual. Any woman rapping can find herself on the receiving end of hate and put-downs. Lauryn Hill, one of the most prolific rap acts of the ’90s, had to deal with her genius being dulled in favor of bandmate Wyclef Jean. In more recent memory, Remy Ma has been accused of having her husband, Papoose, pen her rhymes. Like the genre that it’s overrun, misogyny has many flavors and facets that can be difficult to categorize. But like the air, it’s everywhere, and the vitriol bleeds out into the real world.
Perhaps there is no greater example of a Black woman rapper being disrespected online and in life than Megan Thee Stallion. During the early years of her ascent, the comments were about twerking being the root of her success and the lack of diversity in her lyrics. After she was shot by Tory Lanez during the summer of 2020 (amid growing calls for the protection of Black women), she became the target of a vicious hate campaign fueled by misinformation and men’s pre-existing, personal feelings, and dislike of her. Lanez has since been found guilty of the shooting and sentenced to 10 years in prison. Megan is still harassed across social platforms, is the subject of videos calling her a “snitch” and has not been supported by heavyweight male hip-hop figures. If anything, she was put down by them.
People with a working conscience have been the advocates for women in rap who are victimized by misogyny. The dots have been connected, the points laid out, the grievances made plain. The work is not ours to do. It is time for cis, heteronormative men to relieve themselves of AirPods vibrating to Kevin Samuels and not get online with the intention of harming Black women rappers. There are books to read, insightful, nuanced podcasts, and educators dedicated to informing. There’s no excuse to be unlearned or unbothered and no benefit to continuing down this road. But if you must, know that the hell you seek—a world that grinds women’s value to dust—is attainable. Trust, it will be hotter than you think because misogyny has no true victors.
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