A woman’s unpopular opinion on what it means to be the best mom is going viral on the internet.
Mary Wilson, (@theemarywilson) from Long Island, argued that moms who prioritize their own wellbeing are better equipped to care for their kids in a clip on TikTok.
“Women who are baddies first and mother second are actually the best moms,” she said. “Moms who feel good about themselves are better mothers. When you take care of yourself first, you’re better able to take care of your kids.”
Mary Wilson explaining her theory on how “baddies” make the best moms in a viral TikTok video.
@theemarywilson
Wilson told Newsweek that a “baddie” is all about mindset. “A baddie is someone who exudes confidence and prioritizes wellness, both internally and externally, in order to be her best self,” she said.
For the 37-year-old, that means maintaining her hair and nails, making time for daily walks, watching her favorite reality shows, attending therapy, reading and trying new hobbies.
“I pour into myself so that I’m not pouring into my son from an empty cup,” Wilson added.
She makes a valid point. A study published in the journal Nature Mental Health found that maternal emotional wellbeing during pregnancy is linked to significant brain development benefits in children, particularly associated with emotional regulation and cognitive function.
Research from the University of Edinburgh also indicated that maternal warmth and affection contribute positively to the development of children’s personalities, making them more creative, kind and conscientious.
Wilson believes that children are influenced by their mother’s energy and if she’s not happy, they won’t be happy.
“Taking care of myself, both physically and mentally, makes me feel like a baddie,” she said. “When you are happy as a mother you bring joy to your children in everything you do.”
She reported feeling more present, patient, optimistic and emotionally available for her son when she’s able to be a baddie.
“It also sets a great example for my child as he grows into adulthood knowing that self-worth and happiness matters,” Wilson said.
Wilson’s TikTok clip, which has been viewed over 269,000 times, resonated with other moms on the platform.
“So true! Pouring into yourself first makes you feel better,” one user wrote.
“My therapist literally said this verbatim 20 minutes ago,” another added.
Wilson told Newsweek that there’s a narrative that motherhood involves self-sacrifice.
“That only models unhealthy patterns for our children and it ultimately leads to burnout,” she said. “I’m thrilled that more women are getting the message to take care of themselves so that they can better take care of their children.”
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